Who the hell goes drinking on a Monday night? There is no one who is less photogenic than Mike Choe. My new friend who I cannot be friends with. Forever tainted as a monster thanks to E.Shin and A.Chon. Dunhills. A bruised hand from the tambourine. 최승권. Bruised knees, Hite, and the thumb game. My Barbie girl and me for life.

I hope you have a lot of fun. Don't forget what 엄마 said. Hahaha. =]

Chocolat.

Ack. Inundation.

"til Oct. 1st..."

I feel as if I'm re-living my senior year all over again.



Literally, in some sense.

"Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness; no laziness; no procrastination; never put off till tomorrow what you can do today." -Lord Chesterfield.

My current track record while completely crunked is 0-2.


However, I did get to do something I never even thought I was capable of doing.

It will be extremely difficult to find another drama better than "내 이름은 김삼순."



"Dance as if no one is watching;
Love as if you've never been hurt before;
Sing as if no one is listening;
Work as if you don't need the money
Live as if it's your last day on earth."

"Everything is not going well without you."



Facking piece of shat.

The Confessions of Max Tivoli by Andrew Sean Greer.



Tivoli, København [August 28, 2004]

Roscoe's. I miss our waiter with the sexy radio voice.

1600+ emails. I keep thinking that my email account at Calmail is going to disappear but oddly enough, it still works. I couldn't bear to see the mailor demon's warning that my email quota is approaching the allotted 100M given, so I've recently started deleting my old email. I came across my emails from senior year and all of a sudden, a rush of memories came back to me. Damn, I was so stupid back then. I have emails I exchanged with people who I don't even speak to anymore, and back then, I remember spending a lot of time and thought in constructing some of those emails. Emails mean CRAP. Especially since they have the ability to be erased permanently and be cast into oblivion. I can't believe how different everything is now. I wonder whatever happened to snail mail...

I met up with some high school friends this past weekend. I forgot how much I like them. I also realized how I might not be the greatest at keeping in touch. Two speculated that I must have died and were offended that they weren't invited to my funeral. I rebutted by questioning the possibility of my marrying a tall and rich bloke who whisked me off to an exotic haven far far away. They weren't amused.


I resolve to do better. But to be frank, there are some who I wouldn't mind ever seeing again. Hahaha.


I now quote one of my friends:


"there are a lot of guys in this world. hot guys, pretty guys, God-forgot-to-add-in-a-dose-of-handsome-but-dumped-in-the-great-humor guys, God-forgot-even-the-humor-but-didn't-forget-the-outstanding-personality-quality guys, God-has-forsaken-you guys... same as there are all types of girls.

but in the end, i always feel the worst for really hot guys that are super short. it's like baking a cake but intentionally withholding the icing.

i guess God really is fair. in a way."


Cake without icing...

"Most likely to... date a guy for his good looks."


"But I dated *********!!!"



Oh, I thought I was going to die.

"...빵 아져시..."

"누구요?"

"빵? Bread?"

"Oh, Brad?"


And then I commenced to spend the next fifteen minutes trying to teach my co-worker the difference between the two words. The slight nuances of the English language.

Julie Lee.

Sharon Kim's 23rd Birthday: The Spanish Kitchen, Raffles L'Ermitage, Blink.

Berkeley Rose Gardens. =]

Kristy showed me her pictures from college and seeing her pictures brought back even more memories that I had completely forgot. Since the only pictures I have in my possession are now from senior year, freshman through junior year have ceased to exist for me, save for a few tidbits of precious experiences that have significantly influenced me. How quickly one can forget...

Berkeley was bittersweet. It held too many forgotten memories that I must have suppressed in my subconcious mind because everything I looked at, everywhere I walked or drove to, and everywhere I ate at, all triggered the sensation of something familiar and a memory of an experience or a person that I didn't even realize I had forgotten. I successfully avoided certain people, and couldn't help but run into others. My memories of Berkeley were different from the reality and I realized all the more how everything does change, whether I want it to or not. I hated how Berkeley no longer was as it once was for me, and yet I've now accepted that Berkeley will always be an unforgettable pit stop along this journey which is life.



The food however, did not disappoint. A chronological order of the delicacies I consumed in Berkeley: Naan N Curry, Alameda Sushi House, Brazil Cafe, Hog Island Oysters, Virginia's Bakery: Pink Champagne Cake, Cha Am, Cheesesteak Shop(twice), Genova Delicatessen, Smart Alec: cornbread, Fat Apple's: Lemon Chiffon Cake, and Foster's Freeze.



Additional memories: Finding the best parking ever at Berkeley Bowl with Hannah. Our failed endeavor to find beef jerky at Harris Ranch. Having the freshly baked bread with our tri-tip sandwiches at Brazil Cafe. The #33 Santa Nella exit with the cheapest gas prices ever at 76 with $2.25 a gallon. Driving over 1000 miles in one weekend. Hiding behind the floral department at Safeway to avoid certain people. Hannah stealing ribbon from Safeway. The ugliest Genova sandwich ever. And I can't remember anymore.




I seriously haven't laughed so hard in such a long time. =]

Molasses Clove Cookies from the Dancing Deer Baking Co.

"you can vent whenever you need to."



Lying bastard.

"I just wanna sock him in the face." -Joseph.


Hahahaha.



I wish we didn't have to grow up.

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

"Courage brother, do not stumble, though thy path be dark as night: There is a star to guide the humble, Trust in God, and do the right. Let the road be dark and dreary and its end far out of sight. Face it bravely, strong or weary. Trust in God, and do the right." -Norman Macleod.

"Faith is not a thing which one 'loses,' we merely cease to shape our lives by it." -Georges Bernanos.

Resetting for five.

The class of 2005's senior banquet came and went, and looking at everyone's pictures, I can't help but reminisce about senior banquet last year and being flooded with an entourage of various emotions and feelings. My life sucked ass that specific time of the year: my thesis was nearly due and I remember I could care less about particular things, people, and certainly did not feel up to the partying and joyous occasion that was the mood of senior banquet. It's sad how little I remember of banquet and how quickly times pass... I remember stupid things like being seated next to someone who I had avoided all four years of my college experience, I remember not talking to once close friends the entire night, I remember my beautiful small group girls, I remember that I only got to read the personalized postcards once before that and my pictures were all taken away from me. So over time, I've learned not to place such value in sentiment and feelings, because I've had too many experiences where they were too fleeting. Sometimes I think I've gotten over it, but other times I know I haven't.

"Even though we get older, we're still stupid. We're dumber, longer." -Boy.

Today is "잔디날." Hell yeah it is. =]

I borrow this from Fred's blog.

"if you let fall your Disney exterior and be real, so will I." -chris gray.

"Imitation crab meat is a seafood product made by blending processed fish, known as surimi, with various texturizing ingredients, flavorants, and colorants. Surimi is the primary ingredient used to create imitation crab meat. It is mostly composed of fish myofibrillar proteins. The surimi used in the manufacture of imitation crab meat is most commonly processed from the Alaska pollock or walleye pollock."



I am devastated.

"And the last guy I recognized was Andrew, the mayor's son, and Reese Witherspoons finance in 'Sweet Home Alabama'. He's one of the main characters and sadly, he has the exact same look here as the one in the movie. Kind of lame and boring. Also not as cute or as debonair. But after one particularly touching scene with him and the main girl, I thought "Jahndee would like him" but I can't remember for the life of me what he was doing that made me think that. Ugh. Curse this aging body and dilapidated mind!"



Kristy knows me well. I do like him. Hahah. =]

a duck egg white (2:53:30 PM): we are assigning
a duck egg white (2:53:32 PM): evryone
a duck egg white (2:53:38 PM): disney villains
a duck egg white (2:53:45 PM): and they ahev to bring the corresponding countries
a duck egg white (2:53:47 PM): SO random huh
a duck egg white (2:53:47 PM): hahah
a duck egg white (2:53:49 PM): my freakin sg
a duck egg white (2:55:11 PM): im rasputin
a duck egg white (2:55:13 PM): :]
a duck egg white (2:55:56 PM): Lauren-Gaston (France)
Liah-Sketchy Priest from Hunchback of Notre Dame (France)
Pris Lee-fat white Captain from Pocohantas (America/Native American)
Pris Park-Hades (Greek/Ethnic)
Susan-Rasputin (Eastern Europe)
Kathleen-White hunters from Tarzan (Jungle)
Bo-Shark in Lilo and Stitch (Hawaii)
Angela-The Huns from Mulan (China)
a duck egg white (2:56:10 PM): hahahahah
a duck egg white (2:56:13 PM): ARENT WE LAME
a duck egg white (2:56:15 PM): well
a duck egg white (2:56:17 PM): originally
a duck egg white (2:56:22 PM): we were gonna go princesses
a duck egg white (2:56:27 PM): but we though villains were more fun


I miss my old small group.

This is the second time I've opted for steak against my better judgement.

I finally received my grades from Lund University today. It is official. Thus ends my undergraduate college experience at Cal.

The twin to be conceived later is usually the one who is delivered first.



Apparently, female genes impose a greater influence in conceiving twins than that of the males, as I once believed. There's hope for me yet. =]

The re-commencement of Tuesdays. =]




I reckon it's time for Popsicles and watermelon.

I detest cheesy, sugary terms of endearment. Be original, dammit.

Pho and the rain reminds me of Fred Dong Lee.

Only I would oversleep and be late to my freakin twelfth day of work.

Only I am dumb enough to have a car accident by myself.

Why a boyfriend is necessary ONLY at Magic Mountain:

1. He shall splurge on the very essential $1.50 whipped cream for your funnel cake.
2. He shall carry a backpack filled with warm clothes for you because you have poor circulation.
3. He shall give you a piggyback ride when your feet throb with pain.
4. He shall stand in line for the both of you when it exceeds a 30 minute wait, and although he shall let you cut back in line with him, he shall beat up anyone who cuts in front of him.
5. He shall win you any stuffed animal that you so desire. (For example, a Spongebob Square Pants.)
6. He shall splurge and buy you roasted corn for $2.75. And Dippin' Dots. And frozen lemonade.



I am in dire need of gingkoba. Thus, it is imperative that I record today's memories: "That jack...BUTT." "Kristy! 나 4'10" 아니야! I'm 4'10" and a HALF!" Three hours in line for X, the scariest ride in the entire world. The disgusting gum tree. Hannah's awesome pose on Goliath. Lemon and strawberry Pez. One vanilla creme cookie for sustenance. Sharon screaming three full times while falling on Goliath. Hannah's two-pitched screams. Signs of our aged bodies: pounding headaches, hurting hearts, sore feet, achy knees, hoarse throats, hiccupping/burping fits, dizzy spells. LOTS and LOTS of laughter. Minimal sunshine. Sharon's conquered fear of Viper. Sewon's angelic halo of light. Jane's clever way of standing on her toes. Kristy's Sugary (Sugar-Ray) translucent oil-blotting paper. Useless Dasani water bottles. El Pollo Loco! Funnel cake! The forever banned BCD in the Valley. "Omg, spend the whole day here with my boyfriend?! By the end of the day I'd be so sick of him, I'd break up with him."

Kpxgrlx012: hannah!!!
Kpxgrlx012: omg
Wurzhaberg: psh, dun omg me woman, where on earth you been????
Kpxgrlx012: sweden
Wurzhaberg: miss disappear from face of planet
Wurzhaberg: i thought you came back after winter
Wurzhaberg: did winter just end?
Wurzhaberg: cuz i think its been spring for a while


Kpxgrlx012: who is he
Kpxgrlx012: when did you
Wurzhaberg: .. remember the indian guy i dated frosh year?
Kpxgrlx012: inidan?
Kpxgrlx012: oooooh
Kpxgrlx012: youre bakc with him??
Wurzhaberg: no
Wurzhaberg: its his frosh roommate
Wurzhaberg: hahahahahhah

I believe that everything happens for a reason. Thus I believe that all the little occurrences in our lives always end up exemplifying His perfect plan for us, as we continue to learn about ourselves, life, or those around us.


For example, I believe God intended for me to have only boy coworkers in order that I may be challenged everyday to "think like Jesus and love," so that I will consequently be able to instill more faith into the male species.

While on the 5, I recognized the make and license plate of the vehicle in front of me as that of a friend who I haven’t seen since high school. I pulled up next to the car, glanced quickly to my right, and lo and behold, it was him. It's crazy how a little thing can suddenly launch a deep reverie. I spent the rest of the hour thinking about past memories and how our friendship had abruptly ended. True, it was due to some unpleasant memories, but somehow, you always end up lingering longer on the good ones.



Lunch: I had PHO for the first time in over 8 months today. PHO. I love PHO!




Vecka ett.

I wonder when it was that I lost complete faith in boys.

A definite perk to working with only boys is that I get a bathroom all to myself. =D

No more soon-dae bokkum, KFC, or The Loft's Island Chicken gluttonous fests. No more talks of Korean drama-thons and Omni video-thons. No more looking through discarded advertisements for Michael's coupons in Glendale. No more coaxing Tuxie to come play with us. No more talks of winning the lottery and opening up our own cafés. No más tres pobre mendigas who didn't mind being tres pobre mendigas because we had one another.





Only Hannah can make KFC still look appetizing to me. =]

A new car AND a new job. WOW. Everything always works out for the darnedest reasons. If only I had a new man, today would have been perfectly hunky-dory. I half-kid.



Watching students bike around the USC campus today reminded me of Berkeley and Sweden. I miss both.

I hate talking about myself, but I can't sleep. I cannot believe how taxing this was to complete.


TEN RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME:
10. I have the memory of an elephant. And ears like one too.
9. I detest ugly teeth.
8. I said my first word when I was 9 months old.
7. I do not enjoy the company of stupid people.
6. I like the cathartic feeling of popping pimples and bubble wrap.
5. I only watch the upper right-hand corner of scary movies.
4. I take immense joy in taking ddongs.
3. I am a condiment whore.
2. I don’t know how to cut my fingernails so I usually wait until they break so I can bite them off.
1. I love to poke squishy things like dduk and marshmallows with my index finger.

NINE PLACES I VISITED:
9. Prague, Czech Republic
8. Budapest, Hungary
7. London, England
6. Paris, France
5. Italy
4. Krakow, Poland
3. Berlin, Germany
2. Copenhagen, Denmark
1. Lund, Sweden

EIGHT THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
8. Return to Sweden.
7. Learn to play the piano.
6. Churn butter.
5. Learn to sail.
4. Visit all the 7/8 continents and all 50 states.
3. Open up a flower shop or a work at the library.
2. Learn to drive stick.
1. Send my parents to someplace fabulous.

SEVEN WAYS TO WIN MY HEART
7. Be intelligent.
6. Possess the ability to make me laugh until I pee in my pants.
5. Be a voracious eater such as myself.
4. Always strive to be a better person.
3. Have a strong relationship with family and friends.
2. Love children.
1. Love God.

SIX THINGS I BELIEVE IN:
6. Simplicity.
5. The lessons derived from our mistakes.
4. Counting my blessings instead of dwelling on petty frivolities.
3. Everything happens for a reason.
2. Using your strengths to better the world.
1. God’s amazing grace.

FIVE THINGS I'M AFRAID OF:
5. Clowns and anything else relatively scary.
4. That I will get the chicken pox from my kids and die before them.
3. Selling myself short throughout life.
2. Being unable to provide for my parents.
1. Not being honest with myself.

FOUR SONGS ON MY MIND:
4. John Legend- Ordinary People
3. Justin McRoberts- Movie of My Life
2. Remy Zero- Fair
1. Ciara- 1,2 Step

THREE THINGS I TOUCH EVERYDAY:
3. Food
2. Toilet paper
1. Tuxie

TWO THINGS I AM TRYING NOT TO DO RIGHT NOW:
2. Associate myself with people who I don’t want to be around.
1. Stay up past 3 a.m.

ONE PERSON I WANT TO SEE RIGHT NOW:
1. My grandmother.

a duck egg white (6:42:56 PM): oh yeah
a duck egg white (6:43:02 PM): i did the damn bros appreciation
a duck egg white (6:43:05 PM): and i freakin cried
a duck egg white (6:43:09 PM): what the hell



a duck egg white (6:56:43 PM): ...
a duck egg white (6:56:47 PM): u alwayas just copy paste
a duck egg white (6:56:54 PM): and u make me sound all ugly and bitter!
jahndee (6:57:01 PM): ahahha
jahndee (6:57:14 PM): then say something pretty and encouraging
a duck egg white (6:58:00 PM): hahah
a duck egg white (6:58:04 PM): but i never do!!


Hahahaha.

"For a saint is just a sinner who's got back up again."


We can get back up again. It's not too late to get back up again.

I went to Target for the first time since I left for Sweden with Esther and Hannah. I adore Target. To celebrate, I frivolously bought a love-themed photo album which I have absolutely no use for but which I think is very pretty. =]

A Little Slice of Heaven. My new favorite Hallmark card. =]

I've been getting evocative tingles of Sweden.


Six days before I left Sweden, my friends finally told me how ridiculous I looked on my bike, miserably hunched over my handlebars, and with my knees nearly reaching my chest while pedaling.

Six days before I left Sweden, I learned that not only could the bicycle seat be raised, but the handlebars as well.




Jag längtar efter min cykel, SS. =[

I've been home exactly one month now, but it feels much, much longer. I've come back, realizing new and better things about myself, people, and life in general, and it's been difficult to see those who haven't changed at all. And yet paradoxically, it still comforts me a little to encounter the lack thereof to know that it is not concurrent with my own developments. Because then I know it's for myself, and myself alone. And that's a good thing.



"I'd love to go back to when we played as kids,
But things changed, and that's the way it is."
-Tupac.

Today was my first experience of having the interviewer persuading the interviewee to decline a job position with a compliment one can only classify as slightly insulting.


Whenever two no-lifes get together and decide to be gluttonous heifers, the results are always disappointing.


I'm enjoying simplifying my life.

"It isn't for the moment you are stuck that you need courage, but for the long uphill climb back to sanity and faith and security." -Anne Morrow Lindbergh.



"So, let go
Jump in
Oh well, what you waiting for?
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown"
-Frou Frou

There aren't enough words.






St. Mark's Square, Venezia, Italy.

"I can elect to change all thoughts that hurt."


A little something that neatly sums up a tumultuous 2004.

A slight modification: "Single! Single! Taken! Single!"